Ive been having a rough time lately when I think of my son. Hes such a happy adorable boy. I held him tight last night and he actually hugged me as I cried and squeezed him. It was the best hug ever it was like he was telling me Mommy I'm going to be OK. But still its hard as a Mom to see this beautiful child have to deal with such a hard life. He doesn't know any better now but one day hes going to know that his life is so much harder then ours. Hes going to wonder why he cant run with the other kids and why hes different.
It breaks my heart everyday. Yes I know it could be so much worse and I am grateful for what he can do but as a mother you want you child to have the best life ever.
Hes been making great progress lately and School has done wonders for him. No one says he will never .... walk, talk or whatever. No one has counted him out as totally disabled. We don't know what his future will be like and that's the hardest part. There are many people with CP that live relatively normal lives. I'm just scared of the future. As Ive said many times before no ones future is guaranteed. My life could change tomorrow. So today I don't take anything for granted. I guess its back to the old saying One day at a time is all I have!
Did you know that even when your kids don't have a disability your scared of their future?
ReplyDeleteAs a mother with little kids with or without a disability, you will always be afraid - as a mother with grown kids you will always be afraid.....you see it never goes away. Don't be too hard on yourself.... if you felt his hug and that he was telling you he was going to be OK - then he is. Believe in yourself, believe in Mikey and believe in God....NR